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EPIC RAP BATTLES OF CARTOONS!

DEAD BART!

VS!

SQUIDWARD’S SUICIDE!

2! BEGIN!


Squidward’s Suicide:

Let’s go Bart, Squidward is ready to shine

Me battling you twice will be a waste of my time

You’re not original, that’s why you’re not going first

Your creepypasta lacked scariness, it’s got to be the worst

When my title card comes on the screen, you know you're doomed

You can’t diss me, you’re just Homer’s body with your head glued

On, You’ll be scared once I show you the 5 dead kids again

I’m gonna blow you up with disses, like how I blow on my clarinet!


Dead Bart:

Screw your clarinet playing, read my story and you’ll go insane

You blow more notes than what you did to your brain

I’ll always be killin, you’ll be dead chillin, I’ll be the villain

You’ve never stop me Squidface, in the end you’re grilling

Like a Krabby Patty, don’t stare at me, why don’t you die quiet!

In the end of this, you'll end like the credits, dead silent

Your story caused fears? Well guess what, I don’t give a fuck

Don’t cry now Squidward, come on, GIVE ME A HUG

Squidward’s Suicide:

AHH! OPEN YOUR FUCKING EYES, your pasta sucks

Your family won't care when I blow your brains out and your guts

You wanna make fun of me killing myself, AHHH! I KNEW IT!

I dare you to leave this battle and never come back, JUST DO IT!

There’s no time for goodbye Bart, so I’ll just say hello

You’re even sick of self; that’s why your skin is so yellow

YOU COULD NEVER FEEL THE PAIN I DO, I’M GONNA KILL MYSELF

IT'S TIME TO DIE! See you again in hell….


Dead Bart:

Hell? HA! As if! When you blow your brains, I’ll celebrate

Cause it’s clear to see your death came as predicted on this grave!

I’m a true face of horror, don’t need stretches or blurrings

Your story is the most hated, while mine is still adoring

This little squid being scary? Now that’s just plain insane!

You think showing dead kids is okay? THIS SHIT AIN’T A FUCKING GAME!

See these names on my tombstone, you’re next on my list!

Get ready Mr. Squid, cause it’s time to get violent!


Spongebob’s Bootleg:

I’m ready, I’m ready to kick you two shittypastas

I’ll pop like how I pop my bubbles to stop this drama

Frame by frame, you two are tame compared to the horrors I got, bitch

Squidward, you’ll be blood-shot in the face, with my rhymes that can twitch

You’ll be Dumped in the trash can where those teens found me

How can you beat this bootleg, I’m the real meaning of scary

I’ll make you all commit suicide with my staticy and buzzing rhymes

Now time to bring in the real horror, Spongecry.avi!


Spongecry.avi:

Oh, you gonna be scared? Then watch this scary .avi

Don’t be mean to me, you’ll make Spongebob Cry

Once you see my episode, it’ll leave your asses quivering!

When I’m done, you all will end up like Gary, dead and rotting!

I’ll rip you all up into chunks just like my red chair

It’s best you all run away now, or you’ll be in for a scare!

Squidward, stop with your stupid shit and just end your life already

Before I kill you all off, I just want you to know, this one timed action will be badly

Max:

We’ll make you feel like your heart is in your throat once you see us

It’s such a shame that we need to kill you, so just hush

Ruby:

We made a little girl scream and almost made her heart give out

Tonight, we’ll show you what scary is all about

Max:

We’re gonna leave you dead like our mommy and daddy

Since all your creepypastas are just stupid tragedies

Ruby:

You're all gonna be tortured and deceased

All:

You don’t think we’re scary? Well DEATH IS OUR ONLY RELEASE!

1999:

This bear is aware that I'm gonna scare these "bone chillers"

I'll take you to my cellar, and show you who’s the better killer

I’m gonna eat your souls on this episode of Soup and Spoon

My rap flow is like scissors, it’s very dangerous for you

My name is Mr. Bear, bringing more fear than Freddy

I’m coming down these basement stairs, you better be ready

I’m hiding in these woods in Canada, you’re gonna get scared

‘Cause 1999 is the year where you go off the air


The Grieving (Gumball):

Welcome to my Amazing World, hope you’re all in for a treat

We’ll be making you cry, once you taste your bloody defeats!

The Grieving (Darwin):

Cut out all your guts, and hang them on these trees!

In the end, you’ll be found dead, just like Anais!

The Grieving (Gumball):

Max and Ruby, you were only made cause you were desperate for fame!

Suicidal, depression, you're all the same

The Grieving (Darwin):

Mr. Bear, you’re not scary, so why even bother?

The Grieving (Both):

YOU ALL WILL BE SHOT IN THE FACE JUST LIKE SARAH’S BROTHER!!!


Ed Edd n Eddy Lost Episode (Ed):

Once you see our episode, you’ll be the true chicken

I’ll eat your souls like it’s buttered toast, to make the audience sickened

Ed Edd n Eddy Lost Episode (Edd):

We’ll swallow your heads like Johnny, beat your asses up like Jimmy

You'll be needing a dentist because it's about to get gory!

Ed Edd n Eddy Lost Episode (Eddy):

You dorks are gonna piss yourselves, when you step up to the Eds

Once you take a look at this episode, it'll lead you to your ends!

Ed Edd n Eddy Lost Episode (Ed):

C’mon guys, let’s put an end to these creeps!

Ed Edd n Eddy Lost Episode (All):

We’ll have you laying on Eddy’s floor, and let you have a good night sleep!

Doug's Real Life:

This is my real life, so i'll leave your heads severed

Just like me, i'll leave you in fanasty that will never end

Leave you like my pet: Porkchop, left and rotting

By the end of this battle, you better be running

All of your pastas are failures, like how i flunked my test

I'll leave you like a chicken, 'cause your raps are worse than the ed's

Cover you up in a bunch of bruises that cannot be healed

It's time for me to move on, 'cause i can't tell which one's real


Stick Stickly:

It’s Stick Stickly, ripping through this battle sickly, you pricks

Find my website? All you gotta do is click. I got lost episodes, you'll find 6

Hey kids, wanna play Hang stick? I'll make sure that your necks will get slit

The splinters will hurt, just for a minute, "The Winner is revealed", and you're not it

Do I gotta spell it out for you guys? When "Stick gets mad", you'll meet your demise

I've been tortured and beaten, See the X on my face? No smile, No nose, No sound, no eyes

No lie, I'll write it in bold, the segments unfold! And truth be told

With the blood on top, it's time for Stick to go. You got what you wanted. The winner is Candle Cove!

Candle Cove (Skin Taker):

Better grab a candle, ‘cause your future is about to get dark

Come a little bit closer, I’ll grind your skin apart

Candle Cove (Pirate Percy):

You Eds aren’t ready for the type of show we’ll bring

How can you win, when the puppets are pulling the strings?

Candle Cove (Skin Taker):

Spongebob, your bootleg is a Laughingstock, want this to stop?

I’ll slaughter you and the rest of these pastas, make the boat rock

Candle Cove (Pirate Percy):

We’re spitting killer disses that will make you all SCREAM

Coming out your screen, We’ll now forever haunt your dreams


Happy Appy:

That’s right kids! Appy’s coming back with a rerun

Let’s talk about a tragic event, c’mon it’ll be fun!

How about a 3 minute death stare to help you all relax?

When I’m done with my verse, you’ll ALL have sticks up your ass

How sad, a little apple can get the murders done more quickly

I’ll bring you all to my van, I’ll break you in half, Stickly

Once my show comes on, you won’t be able to change the channel

All of your networks called, your shows have been cancelled


Adventure Time: Catherine! Catherine!:

What time is it? It’s time to kill you all

I’m gonna take your souls like how Zim is gonna take your dolls

Squidward, your story isn’t good, or should I say mathematical?

Bart, my rhymes will make you break, that you will fall

Rest in Peace, Max and Ruby, 1999 doesn’t scare me

Pirate Percy, you arrg dumb, just like Happy Appy

Shmowzow! This is how I’m gonna finish this off

You’ll be screaming Catherine! Catherine! once you’re fucked

Gregory’s Room:

Hello, my name is Gregory, and welcome to my room

I’m just sitting here dissing these freaks, warning their dooms

It’s just the two of us having fun, helping kids with their gloom

Appy, you're more legit than Mr. Bear’s costume

I’ll throw you in the glorious flames of the fireplace

No one can hear you, no police, no parents

Please embrace me, I need love from above

Help me, please, I need it, gReGoRy NeEdS lOvE!!!


Bloody GIR:

It’s time to get bloody, Gir is here to make you all hurt

I'm more useful than you pointless stories that look like dirt

Let's go on an easter egg hunt, you won't be able to find me

Bloody hell, I could find more scare from Stick Stickly

Don't even dare step to me, I'll eat you like a waffle

You're just disgraces that are just awful, Appy, your story is like a novel

How could you say you won, you were turkeys the whole time

You've met your doom, and you'll never ever survive

Fluttershy’s Lullaby:

You better hush now, quiet now, once I put you to sleep

This GIR is nothing, you’ll be next to die as you weep

The Crusaders were just the beginning, you’ll soon see

With your piercing screams, you’ll be another gift from Rarity

I’m the element of kindness, so there’s no way I can hate

But come with me children, your death bed awaits

You’re too late, you’re as dead as the look in my eye

Sweet dreams for your eternal rest, Good Lulla-bye


Axis Powers Hetalia Episode 23.5:

Be quiet Fluttershy, I’ll have you pass out for real

Then I'll put your organs on sticks to have a good meal

Japan and Germany will drown you, since nobody wants to hear you scream

You’ll be deceased, you freaks will have a better blood scene

than Gir popping up in Invader Zim all the time, I’ll make you fall

Nobody ever wanted you to Axist in the slightest, not at all

I’ll be staring at the light better than Happy Appy’s stupid scene

Just like me, you’ll be cooked ‘cause your disses were just weak


Dead Mung (Chowder):

When it comes to lost episodes, every one of you is nothin’

If you dare try to diss me, I’ll throw your asses in the oven

Dead Mung (Mung):

You all are sons of burgers, I’d like to see you all scare me

I'll bake you and serve you on a dish, these fools will be yummy

Dead Mung (Chowder):

All of you will be roasted like Mung, you’re next on my menu

Cooking Fluttershy, Gir, and Axis in a bowl for some stew

Dead Mung (Mung):

I'll make you scream like an abused chipmunk, that's no surprise

ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL ME? I’D LIKE TO SEE YOU TRY!


Glitchy Red:

Where is my dad? who created me? This isn't where i should be

I've been lied to, i will raticate till you reach 1 HP

I won't give you antidotes, 'cause you won't be able to open the menu

Leave you lost so you won't be able to continue

Don't fall for it! You'll only win 'cause the BATTLE let's you

Just like the game, i'll steal the victory from you

I did i even have to die? YOU'RE the one that deserves to be Buried Alive

After this battle's done, i'll bring all of you to your demise.


Tom and Jerry Lost Cartoon (Tom):

Time for some real horror, it’s Tom and Jerry

Are you bitches ready, ‘cause it’s about to get scary!

Tom and Jerry Lost Cartoon (Jerry):

Take a step into the basement, where your corpses will be

We’re gonna get more violent, I’ll be laughing while you weep

Tom and Jerry Lost Cartoon (Tom):

We’ll have you Suffering at the end of this, leaving you a bunch of bruises

It's true that we'll stab your leg and throw you down the stairs, you're losing

Tom and Jerry Lost Cartoon (Jerry):

I’ll stab you, then sell you, and I’ll do it all again

We’ve won this battle

Tom and Jerry Lost Cartoon (Tom):

DON’T YOU BELIEVE IT?

Sweet Apple Massacre:

Alright, that’s enough, time to show you bitches up

Me lose to you? (nope) you know you’re all “fucked”

Happy Appy, you’ll be bucked and squashed, no doubt

I’ll rape and slaughter you all, show you what fear is about

Rip out your eyes, so you won’t see your death “cumming”

You’re locked in this cellar, no where for you foals to start running

Nopony will ever know, I’ll make sure you stay silent

Now I can forever sit in my peace and quiet

Sonic.EXE:

Ready for round 2? This will be a bloody rap

Don't blink or turn around or you'll have your neck snapped

Fluttershy, your worse than a big mac, a bigger pussy than pinkie pie

Leave you in a endless diss that you'll never survive

Mr. Bear, could you be any longer? I've seen better in FNaF 4

You know you're in your doom once i'm at your door

All of you can't rap against this rap dog

You better say your preyers because I AM GOD!

Angry Sylvester:

Sylvester is here to abuse this horse, I'm sure

Time to tear down these lights, they don't look good for this verse

Don't make me angry, or I'll make this whole scene violent

You're gonna end up like the music of my episode, dead silent

I'll bang you like a guitar string, and the blood I will taste

I'll kick your ass to Hungarian, where the short takes place

Nobody reads your stories, this gory cat will make a mess

This episode ends now, and you won't be coming up next


Ahh Real Monsters: The Final Scare:

Gromble:

Alright everyone, I have a mission for you all

Make the best scare that will make the world want to bawl

Oblina:

We're filled with mallice, no one is more gory than us

Krumm:

Wait Oblina, why are you throwing me in front of this bus?


  • krumm gets killed*

Oblina:

Oblina will make you o-bleeding, everyone will be seeing

Ickis:

Stop it! I don't wanna die! There's not a single reason!

Oblina:

Gromble, I've done it, I killed them all and brought fear

Gromble:

That was certainly the best scare that I have ever seen in years


Return to Sender:

Hello there, we got a package from this spitting mailman

That can mail mail to many nice people, 'cause I can

But what I'll be giving to these monsters, it's full of surprises

Once they open it, they'll be weeping until the sound rises

I'll static it up, then I'll be staring at this mail

It's a true fact that Angry Sylvester is a huge fail

Now let me say something that you'll be knowing a lot

Curiosity killed the cat, and Postman Pat killed the pastas

Golden Freddy (Five Nights At Freddy's 0):

It's my time to shine to take these dirty disses back to the past

I'm the real fear that brings more horror than SquarePants

Murder you with these golden disses you cannot miss

I brought horror to the fnaf fanon wiki, so this will be a goodnight kiss

Strangle you with your intestines as you hear my bloody laugh

More gorier than Angry Sylvester, so this will be a blood bath

Leave you filled with nightmares that'll have you shiver down your spine

From my scare factor, you know the victory will be mine.

Arthur: Lost Episode:

Shut up, you all! I'm trying to read!

These lines that I've written with the blood of my granny

You don't want to mess with me, I killed them all!

You'll scream like DW, you don't have any balls

to go up against this moose, I'll give you a bad bruise

I'll leave your dead bodies at the Sugar Bowl, you'll surely lose

I'll Buster these freaks, and it won't bother me

You all will end up like my Grandma, and I won't give you recovery!


I Can Fix This (Mordecai):

You better run away now, I’m more scary than Red Mist

Fuck your asses up ‘til you're dead, with my own fists

I Can Fix This (Rigby):

We’ll beat you all up, we’re too disgusted to see your faces

C’mon Mordecai, it’s time we put these bitches in their places

I Can Fix This (Mordecai):

You can’t fix this, you fucking moron! What is wrong with you all?

My rhymes will make everybody want to fal-*gets shot*

Never, Never (Rigby):

NOBODY SHOOTS MY BEST FRIEND! IF YOU DON’T LEAVE, I’LL HAVE YOU ALL SEVERED…..

If you think you all will win, the answer is Never, Never…..


Little Bear and The Big Red Book:

Hello there, it’s me! It's me, Little Bear!

From what’s been done, I don’t think it’s right to stare

I’ll leave you dead in a grave, just like my animators mother

Making you commit suicide, and have you dead like Mung and Chowder!

Mordecai and Rigby, You can’t fix shit, this battle won’t last long

You pussies better be scared, when I start to sing my song!

My verse is almost done, so I’ll just give you some time to run

1,2,3… Ready or not, here I come!


The Rugrats Theory (NOT WRITTEN):

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Just like my friends, your victory is just imagination

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This is just all in my head, none of those babies were real....


Lost Episodes (NOT WRITTEN):

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Mess with me, and I'll cut you up like my tapes

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I'm done with this crap, time to unplug the set

WHO WON?

WHO’S NEXT?

YOU DECIDE!

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF CARTOONS!

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