|Squidward's Suicide vs Dead Bart 3|
|Release date||April 1, 2017|
|Previous||Danny Phantom vs Ben Tennyson|
|Next||Zootopia vs T.U.F.F. Puppy|
Bonnie the Bunny
Chica the Chicken
Foxy the Pirate
Steven Universe: Faded Gems
MaNCHA as Squidward's Suicide and Chica the Chicken
Nathan Provost as Dead Bart
Matthew Thomas, Nathan Provost, HyperJacob96, and WoodenHornets as Chorus singers
HyperJacob96 as Herobrine
Matthew Thomas as Steven Universe: Faded Gems
WoodenHornets as Happy Appy
Stofferex as Freddy Fazbear
B-Lo Lorbes as Bonnie the Bunny
Seth W as Foxy the Pirate
MultiSuperVids as Mr. Pickles
Mr. Maplesyrup as Ticket Taker
Wait, it's the third time that I have seen you
God, this matchup makes me feel suicidal
I'd rather get run over by a fucking motorcycle
Don't you dare fight, fool, I'm stronger than leather
Heck, these Skype and Discord chats can tell that I'm better
JK, BITCH! Now I'll be totally dying!
Oh, dear lord! Get this reject off stage
Your whole entire pasta was fake
BITCH, I'm the ghost with the most roast
If I met your girlfriend, I'd give her toast, bitch
Ai cara- (laughs) ai caramba, D'oh! Get out of here, you ho butt
Call me Chris Carbery
Do you take donuts?
You don't even fucking know how to play clarinet
So do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it
Yo let's go, come and grab a gun
We'll have so much fun, one bullet, I'll cum
Then we'll shoot it into your head
You'll be totally dead, don't argue about it
Come and join us in hell, we'll have tons of fun
JUST THREE SHOTS, and you're done, you are such a chump
Come with us if you are not alright
You'll totally die, join Squidward's Suicide!
Oh, I know exactly why you wanna die
You just wanna leave Earth, that's the reason why
Oh, I know that you're totally shaking
I bet you don't even know how to make bacon--
- gets shot by Squidward's Suicide*
Enough of that gay shit! Give me something that ROCKS!
- beat starts back up*
Fuck yeah! This is my type of party!
Hey Squidward, did you finish those errands yet?
Squidward's Suicide (talking):Edit
Heh, such a comedian...
Fuck, I KNEW IT! Now I'll go and SHOOT IT!
You'll see right THROUGH IT, and you'll be SPLOOGING!
No need to say BYE BYE, so I'll say HI HI
Because you'll just come out as BIYIYI
Isn't it sad how YOUR PASTA SUCKS?
Isn't that gross how you EAT YOUR OWN GUTS?
I'M COMMITING SUICIDE NOW, SO DON'T BE HATING!
IT'S TIME TO DIE!!!!! *shoots himself* What's up, Satan?
Yo, I'm the 7G06, dawg
If I wanted suicide, I'd watch Suicide Squad
Yo, let's put 'em in a coffin like Scott Cawthon
Your blood is so bad that I'm coughing
Bart is my name and falling's my game
You might've went .exe but I'm so cray cray
I'll be biting your ass, so please, "donut" be cocky
AND NOW IT'S TIME TO STUFF YOU INTO HOMER'S BODY!!!
Yo it's Herobrine, coming in with my diamond sword
Your shitty rhymes are more useless than a wooden door
I love the fact that I'm not a cartoon
I researched you both, you're fiction like the news
But when you see my shrine, it'll make you toot
You saddy whacky fatties are blobs in my cataracts
Shut up Herobrine, your popularity is Fading like a Gem, tho
You'll be crying like Amethyst, but not hyper-realistic, okay bro?
My pasta was born on Geoshea's Lost Episodes wiki
So now you know that it will be a chore to go and diss me
Even though I'm depressed, your pastas really make me sleepy
Leave you dead just like Pearl and I'll laugh, hardy har,
You won't be able to survive this Steven Bomb! ALLAHU AKBAR!
I'm Happy Appy, the apple on the stick reborn from the internet
I'll fade you out like a gem, that's why your name is Faded Gems
Got Milk? JUST DO IT! Or I'll rip you out like cards and,
Mess with me and I'll show you who'll spook the hardest
Blow you up like 9/11 if you get me super pissed
You guys should've gone to school because class is dismissed
After a dubbed Steven verse, my show comes on next,
So let me cut to the next rapper before we go sex
(Freddy Fazbear is in bold, Bonnie the Bunny is in italics, Chica the Chicken is underlined and Foxy the Pirate is in plain)
Sex with us? Unless you want Fred-deez nuts!
C'est Boooon! Shut the fuck up, Appy
You think you can escape? That's quite saddy
Let's eat! Wait, fuck, Freddy said that already
Your verse was Bull-Schmidt, so get ready for Freddy!
Yarr, m'ladies! Pirate Cove will have you down
I'm Serious, Steven! Haha, you made a pun!
Hey, wanna see me eat a nickel?
Get ready, Squidward, I have come for your pickle
When you invite me to your house to just chill some,
I'll stomp on your grandma's plates, ain't I fun?
I'm Where the Dead Go To Die, no lie, but much sigh
I'll double-dip your fish stick dicks, say adieu and DIE
These 23,503 pixels are all evil, I hope you're not hurt
By the worst person you'll ever meet, no regerts
(Note: This is actually a cover of The Ticket Taker's first verse is from Mr. Mix vs The Ticket Taker)
It’s time for you to watch a movie based on your defeat,
I’m ticket taking your life, and it will be in 3D!
You think loud growls are scary? Dude, you must be a joke,
Nobody wants to play your game, just admit it, I’ll make you croak,
Your disses are stale, just give me a break,
You won’t be mixing anymore, once I win this for god’s sake,
Your story sucks so much, how could people find you spooky?
Thank you for listening to this verse, now please Enjoy the Movie.
(Skin Taker in Italics, Pirate Percy in Underlined)
Better grab a candle, ‘cause your future is about to get dark
Come a little bit closer, I’ll grind your skin apart
You Eds aren’t ready for the type of show we’ll bring
How can you win, when the puppets are pulling the strings?
Spongebob, your bootleg is a Laughingstock, want this to stop?
I’ll slaughter you and the rest of these pastas, make the boat rock
We’re spitting killer disses that will make you all SCREAM
Coming out your screen, We’ll now forever haunt your dreams
Jeff The Killer:
You think that you’re so tough because you hunted me down?
Let me remind you what happened when Randy came to my town
Best go to sleep, because staying up is pretty reckless
One word, and I’ll choke you with your pearl necklace
I’ve got “Killer” entitled; this is your test for survival
The only blood you’ve spilled, is from your menstrual cycles
And you only achieved your creepypasta glory
By copying my shtick and piggybacking on my story!
The one who owns you, Rodgy, kneel as he approaches nearer
Or he’ll exterminate the Proxy; bigger tragedy than Lyra!
Slender Man, Slender Man, the reason for your pasta’s existence
I'll be The Observer as I teleport a good distance
And watch these little kids get brutalized once more
Don’t be scared, take my hand, or else face the four
No goodbyes will be exchanged; you’re all mine NOW
So much fun we’ll have; I won’t break that vow
What were you thinking?! Trying to give kids nightmares for life?
Coming down these basement stairs, giving you a piece of your mind!
Are your spoons ready? 'Cause we'll have a feast on this ho!
Once you think a war is bad, then here comes your TV Show!
With your Arabic language, I can't understand what you're saying!
I'll hang you with your microphone, and you'll be anguished!
Canada's not safe anymore when it has Mr. Bear,
'Cause 1999 is the year that you GO OFF THE AIR!
I'm glad to see you followed me down the flight of stairs,
Led by the whispers of the damned and cries of despair!
There's a dead Donald Duck, dying to meet you,
Don't run BRVR, you'll end up dead like him too!
What's the matter? Frightened by my lyrics so vulgar?
Try and step to me, you'll be fed to the dead Vultures!
You make me laugh, with your ineffective rap attack,
No where left to go, God abandoned you too!
Face reality, your trainer FUCKING HATED YOU!
I'M DONE PLAYING GAMES, IT'S TIME TO HIT RESET!
The only reason you went insane was because of neglect!
BACK WHERE YOU BELONG, I RUN THIS CLUBHOUSE!
You're locked in with this mouse, WITH NO WAY OUT!
Pikachu Z plushy? Aww, how cute and soft,
I've got something better, WANNA SEE MY HEAD COME OFF?
I enter this battle, like a plague upon the land
If you want to fulfill your death wish, I’ll lend you a hand
I’m a “hybrid” of a creature, laying waste to your verse
For when it comes to white killer creatures, I was the very first
I’m from the pits of Hell, though a wiki is where you hail
With an edgier story than your dirty toenails
I understand I’m killing you slowly with each and every line
In the end, just remember to leave a suicide note behind
Alright, that’s enough, time to show you bitches up
Me lose to you? (nope) you know you’re all “fucked”
Happy Appy, you’ll be bucked and squashed, no doubt
I’ll rape and slaughter you all, show you what fear is about
Rip out your eyes, so you won’t see your death “cumming”
You’re locked in this cellar, no where for you foals to start running
Nopony will ever know, I’ll make sure you stay silent
Now I can forever sit in my peace and quiet
Big Mac, you made me do it, don't act like you're so innocent,
Your stupid ass haunted my dreams, and I was the victim!
But now it seems we've come face to face for real this time,
Now let me show you what I've done in my spare time!
(Reveals Rainbow Factory)
Welcome to my facility! Just take a stroll in,
But be warned, you won't ever be seen alive again!
Drain your blood like the rest of Earth Pony and Unicorn scum!
But there will be rainbows to look forward to once the deed is done!
Pinkamena Diane Pie:Edit
Wanna play with a real killer? You won't be disappointed,
Let's have some Cupcakes, I'll throw your bones and joints in!
Oh, don't try and scream, it'll just cause a big scene,
Let's have a party, because now I'm feeling PINKY KEEN!
Don't feel down, Trixie, let's put a smile on that face,
I'll mix you and Macintosh in my next batch of cupcakes,
Let's take this party to the oven, oh, it's gonna get hotter!
But soon you'll know not to mess with the Element of Slaughter!
- This is the third April Fools battle from the series after Luigi vs Vegetables in 2014 and Clarence vs Harvey Beaks 2 in 2016.
- The word "CREEPYPASTA" on the thumbnail is a reference to Ice King vs Discord.