Squidward's Suicide vs Dead Bart 3. Epic Rap Battles of Cartoons Season 3

Squidward's Suicide vs Dead Bart 3. Epic Rap Battles of Cartoons Season 3.

Squidward's Suicide vs Dead Bart 3
Squidward's Suicide vs Dead Bart 3
Battle information
Release date April 1, 2017
Number April Fools
Length 7:47
Previous Danny Phantom vs Ben Tennyson
Next Zootopia vs T.U.F.F. Puppy
Other information
Actors MaNCHA
Nathan Provost
Matthew Thomas
B-Lo Lorbes
Seth W
Mr. Maplesyrup
Rappers Squidward's Suicide
Dead Bart
Freddy Fazbear
Bonnie the Bunny
Chica the Chicken
Foxy the Pirate
Steven Universe: Faded Gems
Happy Appy
Mr. Pickles
Ticket Taker
Epic Rap Battles of Cartoons!
— Announcer
Squidward's Suicide vs Dead Bart 3 is the 2017 April Fools Special from Epic Rap Battles of Cartoons.



Squidward's Suicide:[1]Edit

Oh, hi there, DB! It's GUN to meet you!

Wait, it's the third time that I have seen you

God, this matchup makes me feel suicidal

I'd rather get run over by a fucking motorcycle

Don't you dare fight, fool, I'm stronger than leather

Heck, these Skype and Discord chats can tell that I'm better

You can't stop me, Mickey can't either, so I won't be so crying

JK, BITCH! Now I'll be totally dying!

Dead Bart:[2]Edit

Oh, dear lord! Get this reject off stage

Your whole entire pasta was fake

BITCH, I'm the ghost with the most roast

If I met your girlfriend, I'd give her toast, bitch

Ai cara- (laughs) ai caramba, D'oh! Get out of here, you ho butt

Call me Chris Carbery

Homer Simpson:[3]Edit

Do you take donuts?

Dead Bart:[4]Edit

You don't even fucking know how to play clarinet

So do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it


Yo let's go, come and grab a gun

We'll have so much fun, one bullet, I'll cum

Then we'll shoot it into your head

You'll be totally dead, don't argue about it

Come and join us in hell, we'll have tons of fun

JUST THREE SHOTS, and you're done, you are such a chump

Come with us if you are not alright

You'll totally die, join Squidward's Suicide!

Oh, I know exactly why you wanna die

You just wanna leave Earth, that's the reason why

Oh, I know that you're totally shaking

I bet you don't even know how to make bacon--

  • gets shot by Squidward's Suicide*

Squidward's Suicide (talking):[6]Edit

Enough of that gay shit! Give me something that ROCKS!

  • beat starts back up*

Fuck yeah! This is my type of party!

Dead Bart (talking):[7]Edit

Hey Squidward, did you finish those errands yet?

Squidward's Suicide (talking):Edit

Heh, such a comedian...

Squidward's Suicide:[8]Edit

Fuck, I KNEW IT! Now I'll go and SHOOT IT!

You'll see right THROUGH IT, and you'll be SPLOOGING!

No need to say BYE BYE, so I'll say HI HI

Because you'll just come out as BIYIYI

Isn't it sad how YOUR PASTA SUCKS?

Isn't that gross how you EAT YOUR OWN GUTS?


IT'S TIME TO DIE!!!!! *shoots himself* What's up, Satan?

Dead Bart:[9]Edit

Yo, I'm the 7G06, dawg

If I wanted suicide, I'd watch Suicide Squad

Yo, let's put 'em in a coffin like Scott Cawthon

Your blood is so bad that I'm coughing

Bart is my name and falling's my game

You might've went .exe but I'm so cray cray

I'll be biting your ass, so please, "donut" be cocky



Yo it's Herobrine, coming in with my diamond sword

Your shitty rhymes are more useless than a wooden door

I love the fact that I'm not a cartoon

I researched you both, you're fiction like the news

My game has no car crashes nor prostitutes,

But when you see my shrine, it'll make you toot

You saddy whacky fatties are blobs in my cataracts

Now, get the fuck out of this world, 'CAUSE THIS IS MINECRAFT!

Steven Universe: Faded Gems:[11]Edit

Shut up Herobrine, your popularity is Fading like a Gem, tho

You'll be crying like Amethyst, but not hyper-realistic, okay bro?

My pasta was born on Geoshea's Lost Episodes wiki

So now you know that it will be a chore to go and diss me

Even though I'm depressed, your pastas really make me sleepy

I'll give you all chills like Tails, Rubix, Foxy, and Creepy

Leave you dead just like Pearl and I'll laugh, hardy har,

You won't be able to survive this Steven Bomb! ALLAHU AKBAR!

Happy Appy:[12]Edit

I'm Happy Appy, the apple on the stick reborn from the internet

I'll fade you out like a gem, that's why your name is Faded Gems

Got Milk? JUST DO IT! Or I'll rip you out like cards and,

Mess with me and I'll show you who'll spook the hardest

Blow you up like 9/11 if you get me super pissed

You guys should've gone to school because class is dismissed

After a dubbed Steven verse, my show comes on next,

So let me cut to the next rapper before we go sex

Five Nights at Freddy's:[13]Edit

(Freddy Fazbear is in bold, Bonnie the Bunny is in italics, Chica the Chicken is underlined and Foxy the Pirate is in plain)

Sex with us? Unless you want Fred-deez nuts!

So, let's eat your fruity ass until you're done

C'est Boooon! Shut the fuck up, Appy

You think you can escape? That's quite saddy

Let's eat! Wait, fuck, Freddy said that already

Your verse was Bull-Schmidt, so get ready for Freddy!

Yarr, m'ladies! Pirate Cove will have you down

I'm Serious, Steven! Haha, you made a pun!

Mr. Pickles:[14]Edit

Hey, wanna see me eat a nickel?

Get ready, Squidward, I have come for your pickle

When you invite me to your house to just chill some,

I'll stomp on your grandma's plates, ain't I fun?

I'm Where the Dead Go To Die, no lie, but much sigh

I'll double-dip your fish stick dicks, say adieu and DIE

These 23,503 pixels are all evil, I hope you're not hurt

By the worst person you'll ever meet, no regerts

or something......

The Ticket Taker:[15]Edit

(Note: This is actually a cover of The Ticket Taker's first verse is from Mr. Mix vs The Ticket Taker)

It’s time for you to watch a movie based on your defeat,

I’m ticket taking your life, and it will be in 3D!

You think loud growls are scary? Dude, you must be a joke,

Nobody wants to play your game, just admit it, I’ll make you croak,

Your disses are stale, just give me a break,

You won’t be mixing anymore, once I win this for god’s sake,

Your story sucks so much, how could people find you spooky?

Thank you for listening to this verse, now please Enjoy the Movie.

Candle Cove:[16]Edit

(Skin Taker in Italics, Pirate Percy in Underlined)

Better grab a candle, ‘cause your future is about to get dark

Come a little bit closer, I’ll grind your skin apart

You Eds aren’t ready for the type of show we’ll bring

How can you win, when the puppets are pulling the strings?

Spongebob, your bootleg is a Laughingstock, want this to stop?

I’ll slaughter you and the rest of these pastas, make the boat rock

We’re spitting killer disses that will make you all SCREAM

Coming out your screen, We’ll now forever haunt your dreams

Jeff The Killer:

You think that you’re so tough because you hunted me down?

Let me remind you what happened when Randy came to my town

Best go to sleep, because staying up is pretty reckless

One word, and I’ll choke you with your pearl necklace

I’ve got “Killer” entitled; this is your test for survival

The only blood you’ve spilled, is from your menstrual cycles

And you only achieved your creepypasta glory 

By copying my shtick and piggybacking on my story!

Slender Man:[17]Edit

The one who owns you, Rodgy, kneel as he approaches nearer

Or he’ll exterminate the Proxy; bigger tragedy than Lyra!

Slender Man, Slender Man,  the reason for your pasta’s existence

I'll be The Observer as I teleport a good distance

And watch these little kids get brutalized once more

Don’t be scared, take my hand, or else face the four

No goodbyes will be exchanged; you’re all mine NOW

So much fun we’ll have; I won’t break that vow

Mr. Bear:[18]Edit

What were you thinking?! Trying to give kids nightmares for life?

Coming down these basement stairs, giving you a piece of your mind!

Are your spoons ready? 'Cause we'll have a feast on this ho!

Once you think a war is bad, then here comes your TV Show!

With your Arabic language, I can't understand what you're saying!

I'll hang you with your microphone, and you'll be anguished!

Canada's not safe anymore when it has Mr. Bear,

'Cause 1999 is the year that you GO OFF THE AIR!

Abandoned by Disney:[19]Edit

I'm glad to see you followed me down the flight of stairs,

Led by the whispers of the damned and cries of despair!

There's a dead Donald Duck, dying to meet you,

Don't run BRVR, you'll end up dead like him too!

What's the matter? Frightened by my lyrics so vulgar?

Try and step to me, you'll be fed to the dead Vultures!

You make me laugh, with your ineffective rap attack,

No where left to go, God abandoned you too!

Face reality, your trainer FUCKING HATED YOU!


The only reason you went insane was because of neglect!


You're locked in with this mouse, WITH NO WAY OUT!

Pikachu Z plushy? Aww, how cute and soft,

I've got something better, WANNA SEE MY HEAD COME OFF?

The Rake:[20]Edit

I enter this battle, like a plague upon the land

If you want to fulfill your death wish, I’ll lend you a hand

I’m a “hybrid” of a creature, laying waste to your verse

For when it comes to white killer creatures, I was the very first

I’m from the pits of Hell, though a wiki is where you hail

With an edgier story than your dirty toenails

I understand I’m killing you slowly with each and every line

In the end, just remember to leave a suicide note behind

Sweet Apple Massacre:[21]Edit

Alright, that’s enough, time to show you bitches up

Me lose to you? (nope) you know you’re all “fucked”

Happy Appy, you’ll be bucked and squashed, no doubt

I’ll rape and slaughter you all, show you what fear is about

Rip out your eyes, so you won’t see your death “cumming”

You’re locked in this cellar, no where for you foals to start running

Nopony will ever know, I’ll make sure you stay silent

Now I can forever sit in my peace and quiet

Rocket to Insanity:[22]Edit

Big Mac, you made me do it, don't act like you're so innocent,

Your stupid ass haunted my dreams, and I was the victim!

But now it seems we've come face to face for real this time,

Now let me show you what I've done in my spare time!

(Reveals Rainbow Factory)

Rainbow Factory:[23]Edit

Welcome to my facility! Just take a stroll in,

But be warned, you won't ever be seen alive again!

Drain your blood like the rest of Earth Pony and Unicorn scum!

But there will be rainbows to look forward to once the deed is done!

Pinkamena Diane Pie:Edit

Wanna play with a real killer? You won't be disappointed,

Let's have some Cupcakes, I'll throw your bones and joints in!

Oh, don't try and scream, it'll just cause a big scene,

Let's have a party, because now I'm feeling PINKY KEEN!

Don't feel down, Trixie, let's put a smile on that face, 

I'll mix you and Macintosh in my next batch of cupcakes,

Let's take this party to the oven, oh, it's gonna get hotter!

But soon you'll know not to mess with the Element of Slaughter!


Who won?

The poll was created at 18:46 on April 2, 2017, and so far 39 people voted.



Season 1 Twilight Sparkle vs MordecaiFinn the Human vs Dipper PinesGumball and Darwin vs Robot and MonsterDan vs Pinkie PieStewie Griffin vs Spongebob SquarepantsChris Kirkman vs Oishi KawaiiMario vs SonicDJ Pon3 vs OctaviaHomer Simpson vs Peter GriffinPrincess Bubblegum vs Princess CelestiaMabel Pines vs CatbugDiscord vs Ice KingRandy Cunningham vs Kick ButtowskiRigby vs SpikePowerpuff Girls vs Cutie Mark Crusaders
Season 2 Mordecai vs Twilight Sparkle 2Casper vs Danny PhantomRocket Dog vs Brian GriffinBig Macintosh vs ApplejackSquidward's Suicide vs Dead BartJack Krak vs DannyBloo vs WanderBMO vs GIRTeenage Mutant Ninja Turtles vs NinjagoMarge Simpson vs Lois GriffinThe Grinch vs Frosty the SnowmanFluttershy vs Cream the RabbitRocko vs LazloFred Flintstone vs George JetsonChowder vs FlapjackPhineas and Ferb vs Billy and MandyBeavis and Butthead vs Ren and StimpyEpic Rap Battles of Cartoons vs Epic Cartoon Made Rap Battles
Season 3 Mordecai vs Twilight Sparkle 3Johnny Bravo vs QuagmireCaptain Planet vs Ms. FrizzleMickey Mouse vs Bugs BunnyGarfield vs HeathcliffGumball and Darwin vs BreadwinnersChris Griffin vs Bart SimpsonSonic the Hedgehog vs Rainbow DashFinn the Human vs Dipper Pines 2Charlie Brown vs Doug FunnieAlvin and the Chipmunks vs AnimaniacsUnderdog vs Top CatRandy Marsh vs Homer SimpsonAsh Ketchum vs Taichi KamiyaCorey Riffin vs MarcelineClarence vs Harvey BeaksDrawn Together vs The OriginalsConnie Maheswaran vs Penny FitzgeraldMonkey D. Luffy vs PopeyeWe Bare Bears vs Crystal GemsDanny Phantom vs Ben TennysonZootopia vs T.U.F.F. PuppyDonald Duck vs Daffy DuckEpic Rap Battles of Cartoons 57Epic Rap Battles of Cartoons 58
Specials Luigi vs VegetablesAhh Real Monsters vs Monsters Inc.The Grinch vs Frosty The Snowman (remastered)Clarence vs Harvey Beaks 2Squidward's Suicide vs Dead Bart 3Where the Dead Go to Die vs Mr. PicklesDora vs Diego
Scrapped Squidward's Suicide vs Dead Bart 2Wirt & Greg vs Star & MarcoEd Edd N' Eddy vs The Three StoogesFinn the Human vs Dipper Pines (scrapped REBOOT)Cartoon Network vs Nickelodeon