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Rocko vs Lazlo

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Rocko vs Lazlo
Battle information
Release date March 28, 2014
Number 28
Length 3:06
Previous Fluttershy vs Cream the Rabbit
Next Luigi vs Vegetables
Other information
Actors Justin Buckner
Rappers Rocko
Epic Rap Battles of Cartoons!
— Announcer
Rocko vs Lazlo is the twenty-eighth installment of the Epic Rap Battles of Cartoons series and is the thirteenth installment of Season 2. It was released on March 28, 2014. It features Australian-immigrant wallaby, Rocko, rapping against bean scout, Lazlo.


Justin Buckner as Rocko
Mat4yo as Lazlo


Welcome to Rocko’s Modern Life! Get ready to feel pain and gain
After this battle, there won’t be a monkey to remain
I do what’s right, you do what’s wrong, so just go away!
You’re just crazy, so I’m gonna take the win, ok?
Camp Kidney? What a disgrace, just get out of this
Come from Australia, crocker, here we got wits!
I can’t even believe I’m rapping a spidermonkey with the IQ of none
I’m not even done with my first verse, mate, and I’ve already won!
You're always going Wacky Delly, your show is a Trash-O-Madness
At the end of this, you’ll be sucking my fucking Suck-O-Matic!
I’m gonna squish you flat like the Acorn Flats, cause I’m going to slam!
and then crack you just like your stupid friend, Clam
Where’s Lazlo? Getting beat by this fellow Rocko
Just go make out with your Spacemates, you’re such a dumbo!
You’ve made a big mistake fighting this wallaby, retard
We all know you ran outta ideas when you came up with Edward

Welcome to Camp Kidney! Where life is better than yours!
Your modern life was canned because it was such a bore!
Your name is just about right, ‘cause your head’s like a rock!
Garbage day is a dangerous day? I don’t give a fuck!
I’m gonna give a spanky to Spunky, and simply make the dog dead
How can I complain? You’re friends with the Bigheads!
This Wallaby Wannabe ain't got shit on me
You're trapped in my lyrical web, call me a spidermonkey!
You got 3 friends? Ha! I’ve got about 15
And your modern life was like the worse I’ve ever seen
Heffer is a fat fuck, and Filbert is always nauseous
I’m spitting out disses so hard, better be cautious!
You we’re meant to be a Woody Alien, what a joke
You act like you’re so brave, I know you’ll die and choke
I’m usually a kind, nice monkey, but not in this fight
When facing me, I’ll always be the winner on the mic

Open mic night is a dangerous night, I always say
Mainly because you’ll lose to ME this day
Just retreat now, you’re a monkey abortion who’s a dick!
Go back to Patsy Smiles, ‘cause this is no picnic
Your lifestyle being better? I HIGHLY doubt that
Considering your Scoutmaster Lumpus is a jackass
I may seem sweet and innocent, but it doesn’t mean you’ll win easy
And by the end of this battle, I’ll rip out your Camp Kidney

Shut up! I’ll fucking get rid of Spunky and make you go berserk
I’ll drown you in the Leaky Lake Games, you stupid little jerk
You’re attracted to your neighbor, but you’ll always be such a loner
I’ll kick you in the Beans & Weenies, and make your modern life over
You’re friends with a fat cow, and a turtle who’s a nerdle
You get pushed around because you’re weak, even by a girl
You’ll be sitting in a mountain of pine cones, man!
The end of this battle is like my final episode, ‘cause this is your last stand!


Who Won?

The poll was created at 21:26 on October 24, 2014, and so far 19 people voted.


Coming Soon!


Season 1 Twilight Sparkle vs MordecaiFinn the Human vs Dipper PinesGumball & Darwin Watterson vs Robot & MonsterDan vs Pinkie PieStewie Griffin vs SpongeBob SquarePantsChris Kirkman vs Oishi KawaiiMario vs SonicDJ Pon-3 vs OctaviaHomer Simpson vs Peter GriffinPrincess Bubblegum vs Princess CelestiaMabel Pines vs CatbugIce King vs DiscordRandy Cunningham vs Kick ButtowskiSpike vs RigbyCutie Mark Crusaders vs Powerpuff Girls
Season 2 Twilight Sparkle vs Mordecai 2Casper vs Danny PhantomBrian Griffin vs Rocket DogApplejack vs Big McIntoshSquidward's Suicide vs Dead BartJack Krak vs DannyBloo vs WanderBMO vs GIRTeenage Mutant Ninja Turtles vs NinjagoLois Griffin vs Marge SimpsonFrosty the Snowman vs the GrinchFluttershy vs Cream the RabbitRocko vs LazloFred Flintstone vs George JetsonChowder vs FlapjackPhineas and Ferb vs Billy and MandyRen and Stimpy vs Beavis and Butt-headEpic Rap Battles of Cartoons vs Epic Cartoon Made Rap Battles
Season 3 Twilight Sparkle vs Mordecai 3Quagmire vs Johnny BravoCaptain Planet vs Ms. FrizzleBugs Bunny vs Mickey MouseHeathcliff vs GarfieldBreadwinners vs Gumball and DarwinChris Griffin vs Bart SimpsonSonic the Hedgehog vs Rainbow DashFinn the Human vs Dipper Pines 2Charlie Brown vs Doug FunnieAnimaniacs vs Alvin and the ChipmunksUnderdog vs Top CatRandy Marsh vs Homer SimpsonTaichi Kamiya vs Ash KetchumCorey Riffin vs MarcelineClarence vs Harvey BeaksDrawn Together vs the OriginalsPenny Fitzgerald vs Connie MaheswaranMonkey D. Luffy vs PopeyeBears vs GemsDanny Phantom vs Ben TennysonNick Wilde & Judy Hopps vs Dudley Puppy & Kitty Katswell
Others Luigi vs VegetablesAaahh!!! Real Monsters vs Monsters, Inc.The Grinch vs Frosty the SnowmanHarvey Beaks vs Clarence 2
Scrapped Ren and Stimpy vs Beavis and Butt-headSquidward's Suicide vs Dead Bart 2Wirt & Greg vs Star & MarcoEd, Edd n Eddy vs the Three StoogesFinn the Human vs Dipper PinesCartoon Network vs Nickelodeon

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